I do not consider myself a good orator. I feel I can express better in writing. One reason is that I fear I might miss composure verbally. When I write the tears, the smiles, the loss, the gain all are hidden from the readers. There is a wall, opaque one, of monitor or at least a paper. Every expression of mine is behind the wall, all that readers get consequently is the feelings which apparently have no expression of mine rather they need to visualize my expressions, so the text might be perceived differently by every head. I think I should take a chance to express myself coz I am considered (even by myself) a person who does not reflects his soul. If you are reading it, I think I have decided to break the silence, at least for once. I request you to keep your ego of teacher aside while you read this. Read this stuff as an expression of a taught for his teachers.
Before I say something, I feel it important to clarify that I have included certain names in this text. Some (many) are not included directly but diplomatically. I have considered only those who I personally know as to what they exactly are and what their ideologies are. I regret for not having included all. But if it was the case the letter would have been a big lie and a flattery stuff, but it’s not. Please do not consider the text a flattery or a critical stuff coz that would be a blemish on my attempt to understand you. My fingers shiver at times while typing this letter with the imagination as to how it is perceived. I hope you do not take any of the following stuff otherwise as was the case with some of my friends when I wrote a letter for them and stuck it in our classroom. Some of them complained me for not having included their name, but I couldn’t they are just acquainted to me, I can’t lie to make someone happy. Well I shouldn’t!
To be honest, I never understand a teacher completely due to lack of informal interaction. The case is not that I deliberately stay away but the fact is firstly that I speak less secondly I do not know what to speak and thirdly, to be open enough to say that, I do not want to be a headache to you by sticking to you. I like the company of certain teachers and even talking to them. Pawan sir, Tiwari ma’am, Principal sir, Tiwari sir are a few names for the same. Still I keep away. L
Tiwari Sir has been in my life from the day I came for my entrance test for admission to this school. I remember he was greatly impressed by my performance in the test and he offered me biscuits which I shyly accepted. J In early days I saw his strict and violent aura, the impact of his presence compelled opening up of books in students’ lap. The announcement of ‘Tiwari sir being spotted near our classroom filled us with terror’ but today with time and growing affection between sir and the students that they, especially I, wait for his class visit. I like it when he comes to our classroom to talk to us. I remember there have been instances (two, to be precise) of me being slapped by him. I do not tend to forget the punishments I receive coz if I do I am bound to commit the error again. He has apparently deep faith in me. I can recall an instant when I ethically broke the faith in fourth standard. I remember being thrashed by Balkrisna sir and Pawan sir for the same. I did not realize the worth of being thrashed then but today to turn back to the past to have a glance proves me that they were right in thrashing me. I never repeated any such instance of committing ethical blunders. Pawan sir has been like an elder brother to us. I remember he thrashed me and then pampered me when I cried in my early years at PPS. He has been with me since my childhood and in these years he has become a rather inseparable part of my life. I have literally no ideas as to why he called me ‘dictionary’ some years back. Though there has been a bit lack of interaction thereafter yet the relationship is unaffected. He has been with me and the school in all the shades of spectrum. To say that I feel thankful to him would be an understatement. When it comes to Principal sir, he has always been like a father to me. I always stole words of wisdom and experiences from his talks. He has been a thing of interest and (to be frank) a fashion icon among the student all thanks to his appealing persona. I have at times wished to be like him in my early years with him. But it is time that made me realize there can be no other person akin to him. I remember he once called me (obviously not before me) “mera shishya”. My keyboard and dictionary feels helpless describing the pleasure I felt that day. My Tiwari ma’am has been a matter of wonder for me the time she entered PPS. Her diva like appearance with a formidable professional attitude filled me with a bit fear and awe at the same time. It was with passing years and my growing understanding for her that I saw her getting softer. And today I proudly call her MY MA’AM in my class. J I like her company so I rush up to her every fourth period especially if I feel a bit off. To disclose one of the biggest facts that I learnt about her is that she has the skill of gifting the tightest slap in PPS. I felt it once, maybe in sixth standard. It is harder than Tiwari sir’s and Principal Sir’s slap even! JJJ
The biggest shock that I received in my last few days was from Anjani sir. From the day he entered PPS premises I had a notion that he does not recognizes me or any student in particular coz there have been very few instances of him naming a student other than reading out from a printed list or something. This misconception was in my mind till I had taken my chemistry viva. The time I was taking the viva he revealed a lot about me to the examiner. Some facts were so strong that even my friends and family are unaware of! Something similar was observed during physics viva. I felt like thanking him for his support during the viva but I often find myself unsuccessful at executing such plans all thanks to lack of time and more importantly a favorable chance. I might not get a better chance to thank him. So sir I express my deep sense of gratitude through these words. Thank you so much for your support. And I apologize for having taken your silence as your ignorance. But now I gather that your silence is worth a thousand words. Thank you sir! To take a bit off stream mode I would like to express my affection for Gulrez sir even though he has not officially been my subject teacher yet he is a teacher of mine. I, like all others, love his poetic creations and since I have an inclination for literature (which only a few people know) I have inclination towards him too. I thank Ashish sir for igniting and making me realize the worth of computer in my life and connecting me to my dreams. Before him my life was aimless like water poured on the floor, but he made me realize that I had a stream so I could take a direction. On the same list I would take Nikhil sir. I have no idea as to what I should write for him. I have mixed feelings for him. I love the way he is, cheerful and lively. To be true I have taken a lesson from him to be what I am and to not try to be someone else. Coz everyone is one of a kind. The most beautiful kind of person is he himself.
There have been teachers in PPS who have, unknowingly obviously, made me ready for my next life. Deepika ma’am, Amit sir and none other than my class teacher Bimlesh ma’am. They and especially their persona had a great influence on my teen mindset. Bimlesh ma’am, besides getting me a hand on experience on my skills, has connected me to the contemporary world and more importantly people around me who I kept distance from. Spending around four months with her was the best time in last two years. The way she incorporates studies with fun is a skill I would love to carry with me throughout. Akin was Ravindra sir who made our subject a fun to study. When it comes to Sandeep sir, he has been very helpful throughout. Kamlesh sir made experimentation a fun filled time. He supported whenever I needed. Thank you sir.
Coming to my science teachers Sunil sir, Akash sir and Haridwar sir. I find their words encouraging besides being suggestive. I am never going to forget some of their words. Especially Sunil sir’s at IIIT’s cafeteria time guidance, Akash sir’s bus stop time suggestions and Haridwar sir’s tea talk at his place and his professional approach to his work. There are some of my life’s brightest stars who are not among us in PPS now. For them I just have three words ‘I miss them.’
I have learnt the importance of team work, understanding and true company in the last few months. I have seen, in the last few months, that a teacher can be a friend too. A friend who you can share all your problems all your worries. They have solution to all my problems. They are akin to:
A cool wave on my sunburnt pain; A fountain of ethics, an ocean of love;
A lunch box in hunger, A samosa in cashlessness; A like a pending picture to click;
A quench in dry throat; A phone call in solitude;
A guide in life’s puzzle; A Christmas to rejoice, A new year to celebrate;
A smile to keep smiling;
A milestone to cherish!
The passing years have always strengthened the bond. My ten years passed in this school, more than half of my life! Our official bonding is coming to conclusion but the informal relationship between us is eternal. I have often heard it from teachers that students tend to forget them. But this is just an insight. We might not stay in regular contact. For some it might mean that they never contact you but one thing that is never gonna change is that they won’t forget you. And sometimes in their solitude, in their pain, in their problems, in their joy…they will miss you. You may be many a miles away from us, but you are with us and will be with us in one form or the other maybe education, maybe teachings, maybe ethics or simply memories. No matter what the form is, you will always be a moral support at the time of stooped motion. I take an excerpt from my article in our school magazine (which was selected by Desh Ratan sir against my wish):
There have been moments in my life when I felt angry at you, really I did, but then I did not know the “YOU” in you. It took me time to explore you layer by layer with patience. I cannot, even today, say that I know even the 20% of you, but I’m contended with my current knowledge about you. Teachers, I, from a few years dream of you saying me ‘son’, just once would be like a complete life to me. I might not be following all your teachings but if this is the case that won’t be deliberate. You will stay in my heart forever no matter whether or not, we are in touch. All from me have been tolerated by you people, covering my inabilities, encouraging me even when you are disappointed by me, by citing illustrations from your own life experiences, at times articulately and other times finding us scoop the chance to disengage and smirk at your mediocre narration. Whatever there may be, souls keep embanking indelible impressions, and they say souls are eternal. Some teachings in that embankment shall be from your teachings as well, I might or might not stand a place in the world but your teachings will live for eternity, teachers-I’m pretty sure.
Thank you teachers for finding a moment to read ‘me’. It really means a lot to me. Thank you so much.
Now if you please excuse me its 1:44PM and I got to study for my CS practical exams for the next day and need to take a bath too before Papa comes home, else a scolding! J